I will check on the other things. Would detonation happen if i where reving the car in neutral?
To be honest, I'm not sure. I know it can happen either way, but I'm not sure if it's more likely to start detonating under load as opposed to no load.
Detonation is the sound of the piston impacting the pressure front of the compression stroke. This shouldn't happen until the piston has already reached its travel to the top of the piston (compression) and it's ready to start its movement back down into the bore. If the piston encounters detonation before it finishes traveling to the top of the bore, they collide with each other. The force can damage the rotating assembly.
Ignition knock or ping is similar. Detonation of the air/fuel mix happens too soon... just before the intake valve is completely closed. The pressure forces the valve closed at a higher rate, causing it to slap against its seat. That is the rattling sound you hear when this is going on. Less timing (delayed spark) or higher octane fuel helps by slowing down the burn process... making the explosion less violent.
I know spark knock is more likely to happen under load. I don't have much experience with detonation, but since the cause is similar, I would guess that it very well may show up under the same circumstances.
If you have a timing light, it's easy to adjust. If your timing is too advanced and kicking off the party before everyone gets to their seat, just back it off a little. You'll be moving the light a couple marks closer to the zero mark on your balancer. If you go the opposite way, you'll make it worse.
If your engine makes high compression and your running fuel with to low of an octane rating, just put some premium in it. If you're already using premium, get some race gas or octane booster and see if it helps.